i got a few msges about what I've last logged. it's amazing that theres so many people that still read my blog, its unexpected.

the question, why can't i b myself in my own blog?

i guess i have to say, time passes by, when everyone expected me to be different. i can't put my real feeling out there, coz trust me, theres no one that likes the real me. from my past relationship and friends around, i guess sometimes, people are with u jus because they want to b with u, happy. i knew deep down, the truth is, i'm a very emotional creature, that i felt, one day, i might find someone somewhere to accept me of who i am. well, i thought i found, until, yea it proves me wrong.

life has been treating me real nice. i have friends around me, that loves me enough to be with me, to cry and laugh together. although, its not the same as having certain someone special in the heart, i guess its enough for now. career has been progressing, like how i wanted it to be, so its nice. i guess u can't have everything perfect, and yes as i would always say "perfect will be boring".

though undeniable, there are certain sometimes that i'm perfectly fine, and certain sometime that i felt, being alone sucks. i can't deny that i still misses that certain someone, for certain some reason. but i guess it doesn't matter anymore, coz its over.

i don't find a reason to blog now. its jus gonna be me ranting over and over again, about something maybe u guys know o maybe not know. i shall find my mood back to write more.